sMiLe.......

cURSed

GOoD pOiNt....

Few things are harder to put up with than the annoyance of a good example.
.................................................................................[Mark Twain]

i KNoW iM In ShiT bABe ...lOVe yOu

Passions flaring
The physical craving
That tears me apart
To be with you
On you
Inside you
Endless nights
Of relentless lovemaking
Endless days
I can feel you
Up on top of me
Inside you
Grunts, moans
Cries
Sweet pain
Making love
To each other
For the rest of eternity

wASted...cONfuSed....aNytHing eLSe?

jEsUs....Pt 2

ChASiNG cARs......

ARTIST : Snow Patrol

SONG : Chasing Cars

We'll do it all
Everything
On our own

We don't need
Anything
Or anyone

If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me
And just forget the world

I don't quite know
How to say, how I feel
Those three words
'l say too much
But not enough

If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me
And just forget the world

Forget what we're told
Before we get too old
Show me a garden
That's bursting into life

Let's waste time
Chasing cars
Around our heads

I need your grace
To remind me
To find my own

If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me
And just forget the world

Forget what we're told
Before we get too old
Show me a garden
That's bursting into life

All that I am
All that I ever was
Is here in your perfect eyes
They're all I can see

I don't know where
Confused about how is well
Just know that these things will never
Change for us at all

If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me
And just forget the world

jEsUs....

Errrrr..

tHe sTate oF Me......WorKIng On It thOUgH

have you ever felt like you don't know yourself after years of thinking you did? or maybe my paranoid mind is playing tricks on me an i really do know myself but just need to be reminded. Being in a place where all you see is people looking at you through blinker doesnt work for me. Being in this place kills me everyday. sometimes i dont know what to do, it leaves me so confussed about myself, but then again is the problem really with me or the people that have the problem with me or is it just nothing at all...and thats life it is always that nothing at all bit

"Gather round my wealthy friends
And endure the horrifying sights
Only your worst nightmares can produce
Actual human beings of a deformed nature
Come at once
And come and enduldge yourself
In our own twisted amusement of
Another's misfortune
Yes ladies and gentlemen
Enter our three ring show of freaks"

Paranoia
Paranoia is an unfounded or exaggerated distrust of others, sometimes reaching delusional proportions

Causes and symptoms
The exact cause of paranoia is unknown. Potential causal factors may be genetics, neurological abnormalities, changes in brain chemistry, and stress. Paranoia is also a possible side effect of drug use and abuse (for example, alcohol, marijuana, amphetamines, cocaine, PCP). Acute, or short term, paranoia may occur in some individuals overwhelmed by stress. The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, fourth edition (DSM-IV), the diagnostic standard for mental health professionals in the United States, lists the following symptoms for paranoid personality disorder:

• suspicious; unfounded suspicions; believes others are plotting against him/her
  
• preoccupied with unsupported doubts about friends or associates
  
• reluctant to confide in others due to a fear that information may be used against him/her
  
• reads negative meanings into innocuous remarks
  
• bears grudges
  
• perceives attacks on his/her reputation that are not clear to others, and is quick to counterattack
  
• maintains unfounded suspicions regarding the fidelity of a spouse or significant other

LAsEr eYe........

iN mY eYEs....

In my eyes
you would see traces of darkness
Outlines of loneliness
And slivers of passion unleashed
In my eyes
You would see a salty sea
The waves would be frightening
The black water inviting
In my eyes
You would see a haunting
So dark and deep
That many look away in fear
In my eyes
You would see a fire raging
Ablaze with stifled passion
Awaiting your touch
In my eyes
If you look in them
And not through them
You would see forever.

oNE oF My fAv baNDs

hATe.....

ARTIST : Slipknot
SONG : Wait And Bleed

I've felt the hate rise up in me...
Kneel down and clear the stone of leaves...
I wander over where you can't see...
Inside my shell, I wait and bleed...

Goodbye!

I wipe it off on tile, the light is brighter this time
Everything is 3D blasphemy
My eyes are red and gold, the hair is standing straight up
This is not the way I pictured me
I can't control my shakes
How the hell did I get here?
Something about this, so very wrong...
I have to laugh out loud, I wish I didn't like this
Is it a dream or a memory?

I've felt the hate rise up in me...
Kneel down and clear the stone of leaves...
I wander over where you can't see...
Inside my shell, I wait and bleed...

Get outta my head cuz I don't need this
Why I didn't I see this?
I'm a victim - Manchurian candidate
I have sinned by just
Makin' my mind up and takin' your breath away

I've felt the hate rise up in me...
Kneel down and clear the stone of leaves...
I wander over where you can't see...
Inside my shell, I wait and bleed...

Goodbye!

You haven't learned a thing
I haven't changed a thing
My flesh was in my bones
The pain was always free

I've felt the hate rise up in me...
Kneel down and clear the stone of leaves...
I wander out where you can't see...
Inside my shell, I wait and bleed...

And it waits for you!

mmm

im tired of being fucked over

nOt mUCh 2 sAy 2dAY gUYs.....

sHYt.....

eVERyBoDy.....

When the day is long and the night, the night is yours alone,
When you're sure you've had enough of this life, well hang on
Don't let yourself go, 'cause everybody cries and everybody hurts sometimes

Sometimes everything is wrong. Now it's time to sing along
When your day is night alone, (hold on, hold on)
If you feel like letting go, (hold on)
When you think you've had too much of this life, well hang on

'Cause everybody hurts. Take comfort in your friends
Everybody hurts. Don't throw your hand. Oh, no. Don't throw your hand
If you feel like you're alone, no, no, no, you are not alone

If you're on your own in this life, the days and nights are long,
When you think you've had too much of this life to hang on

Well, everybody hurts sometimes,
Everybody cries. And everybody hurts sometimes
And everybody hurts sometimes. So, hold on, hold on
Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on
Everybody hurts. You are not alone

lOSt......

i seek the dark of night
to drowned out the light of day
sorrow fills me whole
kills my soul
and what's left but sweet dreams

i've missed you since i left
rain of pain covers the sad sky
clouds float low
and blind me so
i can't find my way back to your embrace

wind makes me shiver quietly
it's getting so cold now
but life keeps me from crawling
keeps me from bawling
i smell the sweet spices of you

my mind traps me where i stand
mist fills my memories of you
for i'm in bed dying
so lonely, i'm crying
sufocating in my own carcess

Mmmmmm.....

sOAd

tEArs wON't fALL fOREvEr...........

The raven rests its gossamer wings
Death calls out my name so sweetly
Innocence trapped behind poison words
The reaper weaves the song of my demise
And I cannot help but to lend an ear

I lose myself in the lilting melody
That awakens my deepest desires
Each cautious footstep echoes hollowly
As I walk down the path of memories
Darkness surrounds my silent heart

But stars radiate their undying love
Reaching down to my lonely soul
Beckoning me to join them for eternity
Peace and harmony in the heavens
But I see the emptiness in their tears

The longing as their sadness strikes
Harsh upon the frosted winter ground
Caressing the chill curve of my cheek
And now I feel my heart slowly beat
Along side theirs, ever so far above

Extending my hand to their embrace
So warm with the passionate brilliance
That a million suns could never hold
A fragile body sinks down to the snow
So calm is the expression on her face

Recognizing the reflection of despair
A sorrow gone so long unspoken
Now my voice picks up deaths tune
Ethereal spirit drifting ever higher
To join with the jewels of the skies

rOMeo + jULiet

Two households both alike in dignity,
In fair Vernona, where we lay our scene,
From ancient grudge break to new mutiny,
Where civil blood makes civil hands unclean.
From forth the fatal loins of these two foes
A pair of star-cross’d lovers take their life;

wORk 2dAY.........

fUck it mONAay aGAin.........

Mondays are always shyt, tired, used hungry miss zoozoo...feel like shyt.

oH heLL....

pEOpLe = sHit

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Okay............

had enough....

i fucking hate my life so much wish i could just die or have someone kill me cause i cant do it myself...
i hate myself
i hate the things i have done to people
i hate that i cat change the past
i need someone to talk to, but there is no one i can confide in
i know and admit that this time i need someone to help me
i know im fucked up
i know i am hated
but what the fuck can i do
im exhausted
im dead
im broke
but this time im done
cant take it anymore
i have truelly had enough........

wiCcan reDE....

sTAr wARs.........

aNOtHer dAy aNoTHer bREakdOWn shoOt Me - For mY bAbe

dAmNaTiON......

Ashes falling like confetti

At matrimony celebrations

And the happiest moment of my life

Is that of my damnation

[SeTh]

eNdLeSs.....

As heartache wanders
Liquid wells up inside
Flows away so gracefully
In its gentle tide

To drown out indecision
And sweep aside dismay
Leaving an innocent smile
Only proper for display

The droplets that carry
Shards of my insanity
And tears to wash away
Every trace of me

Fragile mask of happiness
So easily it breaks
Seperates to show the poison
The result of endless mistakes

LuCKy..............

faMiLy.......tHe CrAnbErRieS.....

ARTIST : The Cranberries
SONG : Ode To My Family


Understand the things I say
Dont turn away from me
Cause I spent half my life out there
You wouldnt disagree
Dyou see me, dyou see
Do you like me, do you like me standing there
Dyou notice, dyou know
Do you see me, do you see me
Does anyone care

Unhappiness, wheres when I was young
And we didnt give a damn
cause we were raised
To see life as a fun and take it if we can
My mother, my mother she hold me
Did she hold me, when I was out there
My father, my father, he liked me
Ol he liked me, does anyone care

Understand what Ive become
It wasnt my design
And people everywhere think
Something better than I am
But I miss you, I miss
cause I liked it, I liked it
When I was out there
Dyou know this, dyou know
You did not find me, you did not find
Does anyone care

Unhappiness was when I was young
And we didnt give a damn
cause we were raised
To see life as fun and take it if we can
My mother, my mother she hold me
Did she hold me, when I was out there
My father, my father, he liked me
Ol he liked me, does anyone care

Does anyone care

SaDDNeSs.....

fEar?

I am not afraid of tomorrow, for I have seen yesterday and I love today.
.................................................................... [William Allen White]

a Funny thing fear hey...makes you avoid living and makes you paranoid of the present, why do we fear, i dont have a fuking clue, but i know that fear is the one of those big f'ups in life....which we created as a means of protection. the thing i dont understand, is but protection from what?....how can we fear the future when is hasn't happened yet..well that life hey. Too many people are thinking of security instead of opportunity. They seem to be more afraid of life than death

pRoBlem sOLved.......

GeT uP STaNd Up....

ARTIST : Bob Marley
SONG: Get Up Stand Up

Get up, stand up: stand up for your rights!
Get up, stand up: stand up for your rights!
Get up, stand up: stand up for your rights!
Get up, stand up: don't give up the fight!

Preacherman, don't tell me,
Heaven is under the earth.
I know you don't know
What life is really worth.
It's not all that glitters is gold;
Half the story has never been told:
So now you see the light, eh!
Stand up for your rights. Come on!

Get up, stand up: stand up for your rights!
Get up, stand up: don't give up the fight!
Get up, stand up: stand up for your rights!
Get up, stand up: don't give up the fight!

Most people think,
Great God will come from the sky,
Take away everything
And make everybody feel high.
But if you know what life is worth,
You will look for yours on earth:
And now you see the light,
You stand up for your rights((Jah).

Get up, stand up! (Jah! Jah!)
Stand up for your rights! (Oh whoa)
Get up, stand up! (Get up, stand up.)
Don't give up the fight! (Life is your right.)
Get up, stand up! (So we can’t give up the fight.)
Stand up for your rights! (Lord, Lord.)
Get up, stand up! (Keep on struggling on.)
Don't give up the fight! (Yeah!)

We sick an' tired of-a your ism-skism game -
Dyin' 'n' goin' to heaven in-a Jesus' name, Lord.
We know when we understand:
Almighty God is a living man.
You can fool some people sometimes,
But you can't fool all the people all the time.
So now we see the light (What you gonna do?)
We gonna stand up for our rights! (Jah, Jah, Jah!)

So you better:
Get up, stand up! (In the morning)
Stand up for your rights! (In the night)
Get up, stand up!
Don't give up the fight! (Don't give it up, don't give it up!)
Get up, stand up! (Get up, stand up!)
Stand up for your rights! (Get up, stand up!)
Get up, stand up! ( ... in your neighborhood there)
Don't give up the fight!
Get up, stand up! ( ... )
Stand up for your rights!
Get up, stand up!
Don't give up the fight!

DeAd..........

Huh........

aNOther oF mY UnfiNiShEd dRAwiNgs......

a TV AdDiCts LiFe.......

I sit and watch the images on the T.V.
make believe people with their make believe lies
escaping the chaos and confusion
of their non-existent lives,
look into their eyes
see the emptiness from one thought to another
sit and lie about their bullshit world
so we see how easy it is to die
how easy it is to die,
no emotion
no understanding
no fuking meaning
solitude escapes me again
I hear the whispers calling me
but my mind is too stoned to register,
unconvinced about life’s outcome
who tells me these words
pushes them out onto empty paper
maybe I have the ghostwriter inside
reincarnation of the ultimate fuck up
got cheated in life as well as death,
hold me close, comfort me in my time of need
then I’ll rip out your heart and feed it to the vultures
that eagerly await
sit back and watch this final message
return of the real life will be right back
stay tuned for more enthralling bullshyt,
T.V. addict eats out my brain
switch off

hELp!!! tHis iS bOUt RiGHt iN SA......

WhY nOt....hEy?

MAY I NEVER BE COMPLETE

MAY I NEVER BE CONTENT

MAY I NEVER BE PERFECT

i wAnt yOu iNSiDe mE......

aNOther oF mY UnfiNiShEd dRAwiNgs......

fREak oN a LEaSh........

ARTIST: Korn
SONG : Freak On A Leash

Something takes a part of me.
Something lost and never seen.
Everytime I start to believe,
Something's raped and taken from me... from me.
Life's got to always be messing with me. (You wanna feel alive)
Can't they chill and let me be free? (So do I)
Can't I take away all this pain. (You wanna feel alive)
I try to every night, all in vain... in vain.

Sometimes I cannot take this place.
Sometimes it's my life I can't taste.
Sometimes I cannot feel my face.
You'll never see me fall from grace

Something takes a part of me.
You and I were meant to be.
A cheap fuk for me to lay
Something takes a part of me.

Feeling like a freak on a leash. (You wanna feel alive)
Feeling like I have no release. (So do I)
How many times have I felt diseased? (You wanna feel alive)
Nothing in my life is free... is free

Sometimes I cannot take this place.
Sometimes it's my life I can't taste.
Sometimes I cannot feel my face.
You'll never see me fall from grace

Something takes a part of me.
You and I were meant to be.
A cheap fuk for me to lay
Something takes a part of me.

Boom na da mmm dum na ema
Da boom na da mmm dum na ema

GO!

So...fight! something on the... dum na ema
Fight...some things they fight
So...something on the... dum na ema
Fight...some things they fight
Fight...something of the... dum na ema
No...some things they fight
Fight...something of the... dum na ema
Fight...some things they fight

Something takes a part of me.
You and I were meant to be.
A cheap fuk for me to lay
Something takes a part of me...
Part of me...
Part of me...
Part of me...
Oh...

tWin iNcesT......

oUTSide....been ages since i haerd this one

Artist : Staind
Song : Outside

And you
Can bring me to my knees
Yeah

All this time
That I could make you breathe
Yeah

All the times
That I felt insecure
Yeah

And I leave
A burning path of flame

(Chorus)
I’m on the outside
I’m looking in
I can see through you
See your true colors
Cause inside you’re ugly
You’re Ugly like me
I can see through you
See to the real you

All this time
That I felt like this won’t add
Once for you

And I taste
What I could never have
It’s from you

All those times
That I tried
My intentions
Full of pride
And I waist
More time than anyone

I’m on the outside
I’m looking in
I can see through you
See your true colors
Cause inside you’re ugly
You’re ugly like me
I can see through you
See to the real you

All the times
That I’ve cried
All that’s wasted
It’s all inside

And I feel
All this pain
Stuffed it down
It’s back again

And I lie
Here in bed
All alone
I can’t mend

And I feel
Tomorrow will be okay
But I know

That I’m on the outside
I’m looking in
I can see through you
See your true colors
Cause inside you’re ugly
You’re ugly like me
I can see through you
See to the real you

dUMb........

DeAth tO hUMaNiTy.......

my body aches of dark images
stillness in the dead of night
surrounds my frozen thoughts,
my blood red eyes stare out
into this private hell
I am surrounded by the ailen intruder
burn my mind and state that I’m one of the fuk-ups
for you are so perfect
in everyway,
burn you pyscho shit scum fuk
you live on borrowed time
other peoples thoughts
other peoples feelings
total image,
the scarecrow lives inside
the old world is sacrificing one of her son’s
for sake of dignity,
fuck the reject shit
my minds polluted with poison
true fake casuality,
your kicked out of this world called chaos
live up to mans expectations
for the shadows are always watching
my survival is on the line,
death to humanity
when will it end
death to humanity
when will it end

wHatS mY aGE......?

ARTIST : Blink 182
SONG : Whats My Age Again?

Took her out it was a Friday night
I wore cologne to get the feeling right
We started making out and she took off my pants
But then I turned on the TV
And that's about the time that she walked away from me
Nobody likes you when you're 23
And are still more amused by TV shows
What the hell is ADD?
My friends say I should act my age
What's my age again?
What's my age again?
Then later on, on the drive home
I called her mom from a pay phone
I said I was the cops
And your husband's in jail
This state looks down on sodomy
And that's about the time that bitch hung up on me
Nobody likes you when your 23
And are still more amused by prank phone calls
What the hell is call ID?
My friends say I should act my age
What's my age again?
what's my age again?
And that's about the time she walked away from me
Nobody likes you when your 23
And you still act like you're in Freshman year
What the hell is wrong with me?
My friends say I should act my age
What's my age again?
What's my age again?
That's about the time that she hung up on me
No one should take themselves so seriously
With many years ahead to fall in line
Why would you wish that on me?
I never want to act my age
What's my age again?
what's my age again?

mARy hAD a LiTtLe LaMb.....

gODDeSs Of FiRe.....aNOtHer pOem

a scream is not a scream, only if its heard
a dream is for the dreamer, who lives inside this world
the night is calling, theres a sadness in the air
a gypsy woman calls my name, a whisper i do hear
do you see into the wilderness, with eyes that are so red
the wiccan moon is reaching out, its words are from the dead
i will tell you a tale, its message of long ago
about a man and a woman, and the destiny they did,t know

if you reach inside my heart, theres something you will see
a sacred ancient secret, that a godess shared with me
its the story of a sinner, who lived a life of shame
and the tale of a woman who lives inside his pain
out into the night, the mother knows their names
and looks apon her world and smiles, as her children play their games
so deep within the forest, so deep beneath the sea
age old triple godess, who,s eyes are calling me

i can see within her landscape, as i stare into the flames
its the story of the godess, shes telling me her name
look inside your future and there you,ll see the past
as her eyes inside this night are whispering till the last
a woman has told me, she lives within your pain
as you walked inside my forest and joined souls beneath the rain
its to you i share this secret, for you know me by my name
two souls forever after, dance inside the flame…

sUiCiDe aNyOne?

rOUte 666.......mOre pOems

dead skin highways
the rattlesnake uncoils its body
and sinks its poison
deep, into the back of my mind.
another empty body
sinks into the sunset
as the acid slowly creeps in
and paints pictures
deep inside my mind.
travelling down route 666
desert voices scream with laughter
blood red sunset unfolds into the night
as i break on through to the other side
as you sit and hear me scream.
strange journeys to find the prisoner
too many roads leading nowhere
ghostdancing, inside this night
as the fires inside my mind
burn deep, behind strange eyes...